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Helping Toddlers Manage Frustration When Sharing
A structured overview of what credible sources and parent perspectives commonly say about this topic.
Quick answer
Toddlers' frustration during sharing is a normal developmental phase linked to limited self-regulation and communication skills. Helpful approaches include calmly acknowledging feelings, teaching calming techniques like deep breathing or asking for a break, setting consistent limits with empathy, and praising specific positive behaviors such as sharing or waiting patiently.
At a glance
Things to try now
What to do now
- 11. When your toddler gets frustrated during sharing, calmly say, 'I see you're upset because you want the toy.'
- 22. Offer a simple calming strategy like, 'Let’s take a deep breath together,' or give a stuffed animal to squeeze.
- 33. Redirect to a positive activity after the tantrum, such as, 'Let’s play with this puzzle now.'
What to say
- “I know you were upset when you had to share the toy.”
- “It’s okay to feel angry, but hitting is not allowed. I'm here with you.”
- “Thank you for waiting your turn — that was very patient of you!”
What to practice consistently
- Regularly narrate emotions during calm moments to build emotional vocabulary.
- Consistently set simple, empathetic limits on behavior around sharing.
- Praise efforts to share and express feelings with words rather than actions.
What to avoid
- Giving in to tantrum demands, which can reinforce the behavior.
- Reacting with anger or frustration, which models poor emotional regulation.
- Ignoring the child's feelings or dismissing their frustration.
These are common approaches mentioned in sources and by parents. They are informational, not prescriptive.
What this usually involves
- Recognizing tantrums as normal emotional development in toddlers (AAP, ZERO TO THREE)
- Parents staying calm and ensuring safety during outbursts (AAP)
- Narrating and labeling emotions to build emotional literacy (ZERO TO THREE)
- Teaching simple calming strategies like deep breaths or squeezing a stuffed animal (Child Mind Institute)
- Setting consistent, simple limits with empathy (ZERO TO THREE)
- Using positive reinforcement to praise sharing and patience (AAP)
Related questions
Narrate emotions during calm times, label feelings, and praise attempts to use words to express frustration.
Techniques like taking deep breaths, squeezing a favorite toy, or asking for a break can help toddlers manage emotions.
If tantrums are very frequent, last over 15 minutes, involve self-harm, or severely disrupt daily life, seek professional advice.
Related articles on Parent.wiki
How to Encourage Sharing in Toddlers
Teaching toddlers to share involves helping them develop emotional regulation, communication skills, and empathy through consistent modeling and guided practice. Using simple language, setting clear limits, and praising positive sharing behaviors can support toddlers as they learn to navigate social interactions.
How to Teach Toddlers the Skill of Sharing
Teaching toddlers to share involves helping them develop emotional regulation, communication skills, and empathy through consistent modeling and guided practice. Using simple language, setting clear limits, and encouraging turn-taking are effective strategies to foster sharing behavior in young children.
How to Encourage Sharing Skills in Toddlers
Teaching toddlers to share involves helping them develop emotional regulation, communication skills, and empathy through consistent modeling and guided practice. Strategies include narrating feelings, setting simple limits with empathy, and teaching specific phrases for conflict resolution.
Effective Phrases to Encourage Sharing in Toddlers
Teaching toddlers to share involves using simple, clear phrases that acknowledge their feelings while encouraging turn-taking and empathy. Phrases that express understanding and set gentle limits help toddlers learn social skills and manage frustration during sharing.
From around the web
Temper Tantrums: Why They Happen and How to Respond
Explains why tantrums occur and offers strategies for parents to respond calmly and effectively.
American Academy of Pediatrics
Helping Toddlers Manage Big Emotions
Discusses teaching calming strategies and emotional regulation to young children.
Child Mind Institute
Tantrums and Emotional Development in Toddlers
Offers insights into toddler tantrums and how parents can support emotional growth.
ZERO TO THREE