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Effective Phrases to Encourage Sharing in Toddlers
A structured overview of what credible sources and parent perspectives commonly say about this topic.
Quick answer
Common helpful phrases include: 'Can I have a turn next?', 'I see you’re playing with that toy, can I have a turn when you’re done?', and 'It’s kind to share with friends.' These phrases model respectful communication and help toddlers practice sharing through words.
At a glance
Things to try now
What to do now
- 11. Use calm, clear phrases to encourage sharing during play, such as 'Can I have a turn next?'
- 22. Narrate your toddler’s feelings to build emotional awareness, e.g., 'I see you’re upset because you want to keep the toy.'
- 33. Praise your toddler when they use words to ask for a turn or share, reinforcing positive behavior.
What to say
- “I know you love that toy. When you’re done, can I have a turn?”
- “It’s kind to share with friends. Let’s take turns playing with it.”
- “I see you’re feeling upset. Can you use your words to tell me what you want?”
What to practice consistently
- Regularly naming emotions during calm moments to build emotional literacy
- Encouraging use of sharing phrases during playdates or sibling interactions
- Modeling sharing and turn-taking yourself in everyday situations
What to avoid
- Forcing your toddler to share without explanation or choice
- Reacting with anger or frustration when your toddler resists sharing
- Intervening immediately in every conflict without encouraging problem-solving
These are common approaches mentioned in sources and by parents. They are informational, not prescriptive.
What this usually involves
- Using age-appropriate language to name emotions and desires
- Encouraging toddlers to use words to express their needs and negotiate sharing
- Modeling sharing behavior and praising efforts to share or take turns
- Setting simple, consistent limits with empathy, e.g., 'I won’t let you hit, but I’m here with you'
- Allowing toddlers to attempt resolving minor disputes to build social problem-solving skills
- Providing clear phrases toddlers can use to communicate their feelings and requests
Related questions
Teach simple calming strategies like deep breaths or asking for a break, and model calm responses to frustration.
Praise effort and process, such as 'You waited your turn nicely,' rather than fixed traits.
Step in when conflicts become physical or emotionally harmful, but allow minor disputes to be resolved with guidance.
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From around the web
Helping Toddlers Learn to Share
Practical advice on encouraging sharing and turn-taking in toddlers.
American Academy of Pediatrics
How to Help Toddlers Manage Big Feelings
Strategies to support toddlers in emotional regulation during challenging moments.
Child Mind Institute
Social and Emotional Development in Toddlers
Information on emotional literacy and social skills development in toddlers.
ZERO TO THREE
Teaching Children to Use Their Words
Guidance on encouraging toddlers to express needs verbally.
Head Start / ECLKC